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While America’s Independence Day has come and gone, divorced and divorcing parents across Palm Beach County and throughout Florida should remember that another important event also occurs this month.  July marks the fourth annual National Child-Centered Divorce Month which was created to help divorcing parents make decisions in their child’s best interest during or after their separation and/or divorce. Divorced parent and noted author, Rosalind Sedacca, founded National Child-Centered Divorce Month after working closely with families transitioning through divorce. Sedacca recognized the importance of informing parents on all issues related to divorce in order to promote positive outcomes for the children. To read this entire article, please click here.
 

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Viewers throughout Palm Beach County have watched the Gosselin children grow up on television. Fans from Jupiter, Wellington, and Palm Beach Gardens have written to Kate and Jon from day one. Yet, TLC’s big hit “Kate Plus 8” was recently under serious scrutiny by the Department of Labor for Gosselin’s use of her 8 children as the stars of a reality show. Gosselin faced serious charges for violating child labor laws by forcing her children to take part in the filming of the television show.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

We’ve all heard of job fairs, but what about a divorce fair? Italy recently held their very first divorce fair to provide support services and ease the stigma associated with divorces. If this trend catches on, we may be seeing divorce fairs pop up throughout Palm Beach County in cities like Delray Beach, Boynton Beach, or Boca Raton. Family law and divorce attorneys and other professionals, who offer divorce related services, can gather to offer legal services and aid to those dealing with a divorce.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Are you feeling down in the dumps about your alimony payment? Most people, who make alimony payments as a result of a divorce, feel this way at some point in time or another.  Divorce attorneys from Jupiter to Boca Raton often recommend that laughter is the best medicine to overcoming the stress associated with divorce. Let the song by Weird Al Yankovic, titled “Alimony,” offer you some reprieve.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

If you’re interested in finding out the likelihood your marriage will end in divorce, forget a psychic, call your credit card company.  Credit card companies across Palm Beach County use top-of-line data monitoring systems to make predictions about their customers in cities such as Boca Raton, Palm Beach Gardens, and Boynton Beach.  Swiping a credit card at a divorce attorney’s office from Jupiter to Wellington may hint that a divorce is looming, but the system is much more sophisticated than that.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Divorced wives and divorcing spouses from Boca Raton to Wellington are knowledgeable about alimony, but what about preglimony? Long gone are the days of waiting until marriage for sex. Instead, couples are testing out the waters before taking the plunge into marital bliss. As more children are conceived out of wedlock, family law attorneys must determine how to value the losses women face due to the actual pregnancy. Florida divorce law is currently based on the presumption that when a pregnancy is brought to term, the man’s obligation is toward his child, but what about the women?

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Whether you live in Florida or in the remote woods of Alaska, you have heard of Facebook. But experienced divorce attorneys from Jupiter to Wellington know Facebook is now being blamed for the divorce boom. Originally the social networking Mecca for young people, Facebook is rapidly establishing itself among middle aged users.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Family law attorneys in Palm Beach Gardens, Wellington and other areas of Palm Beach County know that damaging evidence can be found regarding parties in a divorce case on social media websites such as Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, Linked In and others. I have blogged about this issue in previous entries. However, it often takes a great deal of time to blog the myriad social websites to locate the individual whom you may be seeking. However, a new website provides you somewhat of a head start on this process. Flowtown provides you such a head start. A subscriber can submit an email address to Flowtown and it generates a report of every social network it can find with a member using that email address. It’s fast and better yet, it’s free.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Divorce attorneys in Wellington, West Palm Beach and other parts of Palm Beach County know that divorce judges in divorce court begin with a presumption that marital assets and liabilities will be divided equally between the spouses. At the same time, family law attorneys acknowledge that individuals involved in divorces are “doing it themselves”. These individuals may be overlooking certain marital assets that have value and can be divided between themselves.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

I have commented on divorce celebrations before in my blog entries. I also have commented on family law attorneys and their actions in divorce cases.

However, I never have commented on the two subjects together at the same time before. Apparently, an all female law firm in Chicago (focused in the area of divorce cases) posted a billboard on a main thoroughfare and a blunt message: "Life is short. Get a Divorce.". However, the billboard also features the six-pack abs of a headless male torso and tanned female cleavage barely contained in a black bra. Reaction to the billboard by the rest of the legal community and the city of Chicago was less than enthusiastic. The ABC article, reporting about this advertisement, contains comments from attorneys from Chicago and other parts of the country.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Whether you are divorced, married or single and whether you reside in Jupiter, Boca Raton or West Palm Beach, everyone admits that the economy still is not good and that everyone still needs to save money whenever possible. I recently came across an article in Kiplinger's Web Page about the 19 most overlooked tax savings. Whether you are single, married or divorced you may find useful information located in this article.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Whether they are located in Wellington, Boynton Beach, or other areas of Palm Beach County, divorce attorneys know that one spouse can alienate their children against the other spouse, so that the alienated children can say or do the most horrific things against the targeted parent. However, a recent parental alienation episode in a Kansas divorce will have the most jaded lawyer and lay person sitting up and taking notice. Recently, Arthur Davis III was convicted of attempted first degree murder regarding an attack on his wife. Authorities in Douglas County, Kansas state that the attack was prompted by a child custody dispute. Kansas prosecutors stated that Davis encouraged his 12-year-old daughter and 15 year old son to kill his ex-wife.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Divorce attorneys in West Palm Beach, Wellington, and other parts of Palm Beach County are trained in the law, not in providing financial planning .
However, all marital and family lawyers know that financial decisions will have to be made by their clients throughout their divorce, some of which need to be made immediately. Unfortunately, people involved in a divorce should expect that choices with huge financial implications will come at you with intense speed, and they may not be the sort of decisions that they are used to making. Recently, the New York Times published an informative article that discusses some of these financial issues. The topics covered include:
credit, health insurance, taxes, spousal education; increased costs of supporting teenagers, attorney fees, and other pertinent topics.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

The above title will have divorce attorneys in West Palm Beach, Florida scratching their heads. As much as a divorcing couple may love their family pets, the law in Florida and elsewhere in the country does not treat family pets like children (and award custody or visitation concerning them).
Generally, pets and other animals owned by a divorcing couple are considered by the law to be like another piece of property to be divided or somehow valued and distributed during the divorce. However, a recent case concerning Dexter the Pug in New Jersey may be commencing a new trend in the law.

Dexter was owned by Eric Dare and Doreen Houseman, who lived together for some time and then separated. A court case over who should retain possession of Dexter commenced. Four years, four court appearances, an appeal, and approximately $40,000 in legal fees later the issue of Dexter has been resolved. However, the resolution did not occur until the New Jersey appellate court ruled that Dexter should not have been treated like a piece of furniture (valued and then distributed) as the trial court had done. Instead, the appellate court ruled that the trial court should have considered Dexter's subjective value (whatever that means). After being so instructed, the appellate court then quickly entered an order, requiring Dexter to rotate between his two owners every five weeks and that the owners were to divide the bills.
To read this entire article, please click here.
 

During this recession, divorce attorneys in Palm Beach Gardens, Wellington, and elsewhere in Palm Beach County have been dealing more and more with alimony modification matters. People are either attempting to lower their alimony payments or attempting to increase their alimony payments. However, experienced marital and family lawyers know that this trend is occurring against a backdrop of a growing movement throughout the United States for alimony reform. Pressures are mounting to change alimony, the practice of which some view as outdated and unfair. The proponents of the changes argue that the nature of marriage has evolved dramatically over the decades. Women now constitute almost half of the American work force. But alimony, a concept commenced in ancient law, has remained remarkably constant. Now, the idea that a divorced spouse should support their formerly married partner forever, even after the demise of their marriage, is being called into question. To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Divorce and Family Law Attorneys in Jupiter, West Palm Beach, Wellington and other sections of Palm Beach County sometimes are asked by prospective clients to assist them in adopting children. In doing so, these attorneys may refer their clients to private adoption agencies or the State of Florida Department of Human Services to assist their clients in obtaining a child to adopt. At the same time, these attorneys also know that you can find almost anything advertised on the internet. Seldom have divorce attorneys witnessed both concepts combined. However, recently a Craigslist adoption ad created this unlikely combination.

Recently, in Washington state, a young mother offered on Craigslist for her baby-to-be for adoption. Craigslist is an internet website that permits individuals to offer and seek a variety of services and items. I have blogged in the past about Craigslist being used in divorce situations. To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Imagine you are on vacation with your three young daughters (ages 18 months, 4, and 5). Like most young parents, you take a lot of photos of your children during the vacation. One night during the vacation you are relaxed and the kids are in a playful, goofy mood during bath time and you take a few photos of them. After you return from vacation, you turn in your 144 vacation photos to be copied at your local Wal Mart (of which 8 photos concern your young children partially nude in the bath). Wal Mart calls the police and reports you as potentially possessing child pornography.
Imagine that during the investigation of this allegation that you are identified as a potential child abuser to your neighbors, relatives, and co-workers and that at the end of investigation you are suspended from your job with the local school district and your names are placed on a state child abuser registry. Despite your pleas of innocence, your children are removed from your custody by the local state agency and not returned to your care for thirty days and then only after a medical evaluation of the children has demonstrated no indications of abuse and a judge has ordered the return of the children to you. This horrifying scenario sounds like it might only be found in the script for a bad soap opera. Unfortunately, for Lisa and Anthony Demaree it is horrifyingly true. To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Experienced divorce attorneys in Wellington, Jupiter, and other areas of Palm Beach County know that among the most contested issues in a divorce case revolves around custody (or majority time sharing as it is currently known in Florida). Marital and family lawyers will acknowledge that one of the concerns that they often hear surrounds the area whether the child is being harmed or neglected. Case law in Florida and other jurisdictions have wrestled with various formulations of this issue. One well documented harm/neglect issue is smoking in the presence of your asthma suffering child. In some cases, such action has resulted in the loss of custody/majority time share. Legal observers also have noticed the issue of overweight or obese children have been raised in litigation in recent years, resulting in some parents losing custody of their children. To read this entire article, please click here.
 

The above headline would cause disbelief in most divorce attorneys, whether they are located in Jupiter, Wellington or elsewhere in Palm Beach County.
The national statistics for first time marriages to end in divorce still hovers around the 50% mark. Nevertheless, the State of California has authorized the backers of a constitutional amendment to ban divorce to begin collecting signatures to put the proposed constitutional amendment before voters. The proponents of this amendment have until March 10, 2010 to collect the needed signatures of registered voters in order to place the matter on the ballot for next year. To read the entire article about this proposed amendment, please click here.
 

Attorneys and their family law clients in Palm Beach County are either involved in social media or are aware of social media and our society's ever increasing involvement with it.  I have previously blogged about the impact of social media in divorce cases.  However, recently a Facebook communication resulted in its author getting arrested.  A woman in Tennessee recently was arrested for allegedly violating a legal order of protection (that had been previously filed against her) for sending a virtual 'poke' to another woman on Facebook.  The "poke" feature on Facebook may be used to convey a variety of meanings, including simply saying "hi" to friends.  When you poke someone on Facebook, an alert pops up in the corner of that person's Facebook page, alerting them of your poke.  Unfortunately for the Tennessee woman in question, the protective order, filed against her, prohibited her from "telephoning, contacting, or otherwise communicating with the petitioner, directly or indirectly.  Although "poking" is a somewhat passive and new form of correspondence, it is still a form of communication that was prohibited by the protective order.
 

Family law attorneys in West Palm Beach and in other sections of Palm Beach County recognize that hostilities may seriously harm children in highly contentious divorce cases. In such cases, parents sometimes can attempt to alienate their children from the other parent. Sometimes the manipulation of their child is blatant (concealing phone calls, gifts, or letters, then the parent uses the lack of contact as proof that the other parent doesn't love the child). At other times, the alienation is more subtle as in "I'm sure nothing bad will happen to you at Mommy's House" or "I've put a cell phone in your suitcase. Call when everyone's asleep to tell me that you're OK.".
Over time, such behavior may cause a child to evolve from one who is strongly bonded in a loving relationship with the targeted parent to a child (who rejects the targeted parent as someone who is bad and/or dangerous. These children come to doggedly resist contact with the alienated parent , sometimes permanently, out of an irrational hate or fear.
 

Most experienced divorce attorneys in Wellington and West Palm Beach would answer the above question with: "yes". However, the studies dealing with this issue are split. Some say "yes" and some say "no". Some marital and family lawyers may argue the contrary argument and assert that cohabiting permits young people to get to know their potential mates and evaluate compatibility before they commit to marriage. However, I have never been in a group of divorce lawyers or lay people who agreed unanimously on any issue, and the same would be true here. Other legal counselors could argue that cohabitators would place less value on the traditional concept of "til death do us part".

If you live in Jupiter or Wellington, then you are aware of the concentration of horse owners and riders in these areas of Palm Beach County. However, horse owners are distributed throughout Palm Beach County.
Like other family pets, horses are considered to be property and if determined to be marital property, they will be distributed by the courts in the equitable distribution of marital assets. As in all divorce cases, sometimes disputes over ownership may erupt during the proceedings. For instance, was the horse purchased before or after the commencement of the marriage or is the horse actually owned by the divorcing couple or by an outside person?   

Whether you live in Palm Beach Gardens or in Boynton Beach, common sense indicates that an addiction by a spouse can lead to a divorce. However, when we think of addiction, we often focus upon alcoholism, other forms of substance abuse, and gambling. However, divorce attorneys in Palm Beach County during the past ten years have been more frequently confronted with clients with complaints that their spouses suffer from a form of internet addiction. However, when does an interest in the internet evolve into an addiction?  

Family and marital Lawyers can confront Parental Alienation in highly contested custody and visitation cases.  Seasoned divorce attorneys would agree that such cases are difficult to litigate and to resolve.  I have discussed this thorny issue in previous blogs.  Parental Alienation occurs where one parent, through a variety of actions and statements, begins a process of transforming the positive feelings that a child has for the other parent into negative feelings and, in extreme cases, hatred.   

We live in an age where more and more people want and need convenience in their lives. One such invention that has resulted from this need is the Global Tracking System (GPS). Most people use their GPS devices to pinpoint the exact coordinates of their location at any given time and/or how to get from point "A" to point "B". However, whether they are located in Wellington or in Palm Beach Gardens, experienced divorce attorneys know that a version of a GPS can be used to track where people go in their vehicles.
GPS tracking units can pinpoint vehicles or individuals and relay that information to a centralized location. GPS tracking can be used to locate vehicles, detect speed, view vehicle routes, view where a vehicle has stopped, report mileage, create maps of routes traveled, and more.

Marital and family attorneys in Palm Beach Gardens, Boynton Beach, and other parts of Palm Beach County would not be surprised at the concept that a divorce can negatively affect a person's emotional and physical health.  By definition, the breakup of a marriage is disruptive to people's lives on many levels.  However, a recent study has found that finding a new partner may not be enough to reverse the physical and psychological negative impacts of a divorce.  Waite and Mary Elizabeth Hughes of the John Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health analyzed data collected from nearly 9,000 adults from ages 51 to 61.

Jill and Kevin's Wedding Dance became an overnight sensation, going viral with over 12 million plays. I have commented on it earlier in my blogs. Because of its popularity, inevitably a parody of it has been produced. College Humor, a comedy troop, has produced Jill and Kevin's divorce dance.
Click here to read my entire comment and watch the video.

You do not have to be a marital and family law attorney to know that divorces can become nasty and that people in a deteriorating relationship may not use the best judgment. Under such circumstances, spouses may act in ways that they may not act ordinarily. However, because they are using bad judgment does not mean that their lawyer must follow suit. However, such good judgment appeared to be allegedly lacking in a Chattanooga law firm. It was sued by a disgruntled husband for attempting to use evidence that its attorneys knew was illegally obtained through electronic interception (spyware).

Electronic data (such as emails) is being used more and more frequently in divorce cases in Palm Beach County and around the country. The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers recently surveyed over 600 family lawyers. Eighty eight per cent (88%) noted that the number of cases introducing electronic data as evidence has increased in the past five years. This electronic data includes emails, text messaging, internet browsing and other forms of electronic monitoring.
Click here to read the entire article and interesting case.

Marital and family lawyers in West Palm Beach and elsewhere in Palm Beach County are often viewed by their clients in the more traditional attorney role as general legal counselor.  Consequently, it is not unusual that clients often willingly accept counsel, advice, and referrals from their divorce attorneys on other legal issues and other areas of their lives.  In this capacity I am passing on to our clients and friends the following information that I have received regarding Florida's recent increase in the fees for registration fees for automobiles and trucks.  In this troubled economy we need to save money whenever possible.  I anticipate that some of you will find this information useful.
Click here to read the entire article.

I grew up with pugs as canine companions and my children also grew up with these tough little comedians of the dog world. Consequently, the ongoing "custody fight" involving Dexter, the pug, caught my eye. This ongoing legal issue, concerning Dexter and his two unmarried owners, have cost each of his owners over twenty thousand dollars in attorney fees thus far, and those costs are continuing to increase.
Click here to read the entire article.

Divorce attorneys in Palm Beach Gardens and else where in Palm Beach County are sometimes asked what does it take to make a successful marriage.  Well if creativity and fun have anything to do with it, then the couple in this video should remain married for a long time.
Click here to see the video.

Experienced family lawyers in West Palm Beach are accustomed to representing wealthy people in their divorces. Because of their income and assets, these individuals may have lavish lifestyles. However, a break up of a wealthy couple will cause even the most jaded divorce attorney to take notice. Such is the dissolution of marriage case of 67 years old George David and 37 years old Marie Douglas. Three years into their seven year marriage, the parties signed a post-nuptial agreement that provided to the wife 43 million dollars in stock, hedge fund shares, jewelry, and properties in Sweden (the native country of the wife) and the amount of an additional 4 million dollars. The wife has attempted to vacate the agreement during the pending divorce and asserts that these amounts are insufficient to support her lifestyle. Click here to read the entire article.

We live in stressful times.  The demands of our jobs, education, families, organizations to which we belong, and other obligations tear us in a million directions at once.  Sometimes the stress seems so unrelenting, we think it will never end.  Divorce attorneys often deal with good people at their worst and who are experiencing one of the most stressful times in their lives.  Whether you live in Palm Beach County, Florida, or in Nome, Alaska, we all need to find time to relax. 

Recently, I came across this story that reinforces our need to stop and let go once in a while (click here to read the full article):

Michael Jackson's unexpected death has shocked the world.  Michael Jackson experienced a great deal of controversy and litigation, including criminal cases, during his life.  However, he probably never expected that his children would ever be engaged in a full-blown custody battle.  However, experienced divorce attorneys in Palm beach County and elsewhere know that such a battle may be looming on the horizon. 

Michael Jackson had sole custody over his children:  Prince Michael (age 12), Paris Katherine (age 11), and Prince Michael II (more commonly known as Blanket) (age 7).  The question now is who will raise them during the rest of their childhood.  The answer to this issue is not clear cut.  Among the candidates are (click here to read the full article):

Divorce attorneys in West Palm Beach and elsewhere are often looked upon by their clients as family legal counselors in areas beyond those encompassed by family law.  Marital lawyers often hear about the woes and concerns that their clients have about their children.  Teenagers and driving is one such area.  Parents concerned about teenagers driving have basis in fact.  Teenagers can be inattentive, distracted, and often are tempted to split their attention between driving and other activities.  My thanks to Attorney Ted Leopold for the following article that provides a new tool that concerned parents can use to alleviate this concern: 

New Electronic Key Device Prevents Driving While Using Cell Phone  

To read the entire article and  learn more about this new device, please click here.  

Family lawyers throughout Palm Beach County are familiar with the continuing debate concerning children's rights, both in the context of divorce cases and elsewhere.  However, a decision from a Canadian Court during the past year will have most attorneys and parents throughout Florida scratching their heads.  Apparently, a divorced Canadian father caught his 12 year old daughter accessing banned websites and posting inappropriate photos of herself on a dating website.  Like most responsible parents, he grounded her and her restrictions included not being able to participate in the class end of the year camping trip.

The young lady then found a lawyer to represent her and was able to convince a judge to overturn her father's decision and have the judge enter an order requiring the father to permit the 12 year old to participate in the class camping trip.   

To read the entire article and  learn more about this rather strange Canadian court decision, please click here.  

When does the date of your separation matter?  When you are Mel Gibson.  Family lawyers in West Palm Beach, Florida know that Florida is an equitable distribution state.  Consequently, the marital estate (consisting of the assets and liabilities to be divided in a divorce) commences on the date of the marriage and ends upon the filing of the divorce petition or on an alternative date agreed upon by the parties. 

Click here to read the entire article.

You can buy and sell almost anything on the Internet.  Just log onto eBay some time and you will be amazed by what people are selling.  How and what you sell is limited only by your own creativity.  Recently, a divorced man apparently got a little too creative on Craigslist while attempting to terminate his alimony order.  My thanks to divorce lawyer Robert M. Kisselburgh of the Mississippi Family Law Blog for the following post:

"Man offers to pay for someone to marry ex‑wife."

During my 30 years of practicing family law, I have had the opportunity to observe courtroom dress in divorce cases throughout Palm Beach County, around the State of Florida, and in several states.  I am still sometimes shocked at what I see people wearing in the courtroom.  People seem to forget that they are appearing in a court of law.  Divorce attorneys around the country also would agree with me.  In a court of law, judges, court personnel, attorneys, and other litigants are entitled to respect.  Part of showing respect for the court and its participants is dressing appropriately.  Please click here to learn more about some of the basic rules.

Divorce attorneys are experienced in assisting people in dissolving their marriages.  Consequently, we are often asked how can one keep a marriage from breaking up.  Family lawyers in West Palm Beach and elsewhere will shake their heads in disbelief regarding the results of this recent study.  The University of Denver Center for Marital and Family Studies recently studied the divorce rates before and after cities received a major league baseball team.  This study found such cities did experience a lower divorce rate.  In addition, it also found a 28 percent lower divorce rate for such cities than cities without a major league baseball franchise.  There may be many explanations for this significant difference.  Professor Howard Markman cites the importance of fun and friendship in a healthy marriage.  Going to baseball games is one way couples can have fun together and talk as friends.  One may wonder whether marriage counselors will be passing out passes to baseball games to couples seeking to better their marriages.  To learn more about this study and whether baseball truly helps save marriages, click here.

As family law attorneys around Palm Beach County have found, many potential clients are enthusiastic about the concept of collaborative divorce.  They see the advantages of spending less money and time than they would in using other methods for reaching resolution of separation and divorce problems.  They are excited about producing an agreement better suited to their family’s own unique needs in a less stressful environment than traditional adversarial litigation.  Nevertheless, many clients often are at a loss as to how to convince their spouse to engage in a collaborative process.  The following are some hints and suggestions that my office has passed on to clients in the past:

1.         Talk with your spouse to determine if there is a shared commitment to a collaborative win‑win conflict resolution.  Let your spouse know that you are determined to behave in a respectful, ethical manner and want to ensure that both of you engage in a process that permits you to do so; that you believe you and your spouse value a negotiated solution that meets your needs now and in the future rather than putting those decisions in the hands of an uninterested judge; and that you believe both of you should commit your energy towards creative problem solving rather than blaming and revenge that may occur in the heat of a combat of a contested divorce;

2.         Prepare an information packet about collaborative divorce to share with your spouse.  Sometimes the written word is more convincing than a conversation.  If you have contacted a collaborative divorce attorney, they may have materials for you to use;

3.         You may be able to obtain the aid of your marriage counselor or your children’s counselor.  If the counselor is educated and can speak knowledgably about collaborative divorce, then that mental health professional may be able to convince your spouse to engage in a collaborative divorce or separation;

4.         Provide your spouse with a list of websites that discuss and/or offer collaborative divorce services.  One such website exists for the International Association of Collaborative Professionals at www.collaborativepractice.com ;

5.         Invite your spouse to call and talk to a collaborative divorce lawyer or coach.  You may be able to provide your spouse websites for your local area which identify attorneys and other related professionals who are educated and trained in collaborative divorce.  If you have selected a collaborative attorney, then he or she may be willing to send an introductory letter and information packet to your spouse; and

6.         Consider asking a close family member or friend to discuss the positive benefits of a collaborative divorce with your spouse.  Individuals whom your spouse trusts may be able to offer sufficient encouragement for your husband or wife to try this very rewarding alternative.

You never know what combination of the above may be enough to convince a reluctant spouse to become an enthusiastic participant in a collaborative process.  Your future, your children’s future, and a civil continuing relationship with your spouse are the rewards that you may gain from engaging in a collaborative process.  Those rewards certainly are worth an additional effort to convince your significant other that the rewards of being creative far outweigh any fears or hesitations either one of you may feel in engaging in a collaborative divorce.

This is a line from a song made famous in the 1970s.  However, it also can apply to a Wisconsin father who recently won an appeal from that state's intermediate level appellate court.  His victory saved him from having to pay nearly $4,000.00 in legal fees.  However, the case is somewhat noteworthy because the father represented himself and composed his legal brief in rap lyrics.  In its ruling, the appellate court made no mention of his musical presentation, but the father is convinced that this form of expression played a significant role in his prevailing in his appeal.  While the case is probably not likely to set a new standard in legal drafting, it highlights that creativity sometimes can be awarded in the legal arena.  That being said, I do not anticipate that divorce lawyers in West Palm Beach or elsewhere will be using rap lyrics to make their points in court.  To learn more about our musically inclined pro se litigant, please click here.

Many couples search for a process to dissolve their marriage in a less expensive, less acrimonious fashion.  When conducting their search, they have often come across the term “collaborative divorce” or “collaborative law”.
 

Collaborative law or collaborative divorce is a dispute resolution system that permits the parties to a divorce or a family law issue to settle out of court in a respectful, private, and mutually agreeable manner.  The parties each have their own attorneys, but they agree at the outset not to go to court.  Instead, they set goals, gather information, create solutions, and reach agreements in a series of relatively short meetings which they schedule themselves.  The parties and their attorneys control the timing, the subjects and, most importantly, the solutions.  The courts are used to formalize the agreements, once the parties have worked things out.

To read this entire article, please click here.
 

Readers of this blog will remember my reporting of the medical doctor in New York, who, in the context of his divorce, demanded the return of his kidney (which had been transplanted into his wife) or be awarded its exorbitant value.  Recently, the New York trial court denied this claim.  The court found that although the definition of marital property is considered to be elastic and able to encompass many forms of property, the definition cannot be stretched to include donated organs.  In addition, New York makes it illegal for any person to knowingly acquire for valuable consideration any human organ for use in human transplantation.  Family lawyers in West Palm Beach and around the country will not be surprised by this result.  Nevertheless, the claim made by the disgruntled husband in this case demonstrates the lengths that embattled spouses may go to in making claims in a highly contested divorce.  It will be interesting to see what additonal bizarre claims this warring couple will make during the dissolution of their marriage.  To learn more about this decision please click here.
 

This Saturday (April 25th) is Parental Alienation Awareness Day.  Parental Alienation is a process whereby one parent (and his or her relatives and other allies) by his or her actions or communications undermines the love, affection, and relationship between their children and the targeted spouse.  The process can occur during a disintegrating relationship,  during a divorce, and after the divorce has concluded.  The actions and words can be overt or subtle.  The results can range from mild to extreme alienation (wherein the alienated children want nothing to do with the targeted parent and will strongly resist contact with the alienated parent).  In such cases, no one can doubt the psychological pain and emotional distress suffered by the alienated parent.  Experienced family lawyers in Palm Beach County and divorce attorneys elsewhere recognize that in an extreme case of parental alienation, reunifying and normalizing the relationship between extremely alienated children and the targeted parent can be a difficult, if not an impossible task.  In those cases, the alienated parents have had little recourse to other legal forums to collect damages.  However, recently in New Jersey, a trial court judge found that a parent may have a claim for intentional infliction of mental distress against the alienating parent.  Such cases in the past have been dismissed as invalid actions because "alienation of affections" had been abolished by almost every jurisdiction in the United States because it was an inappropriate "heart balm" legal theory.  However, the New Jersey judge found that the moving party's claim for emotional distress is separate and distinct form the abolished claim of alienation of affections.  It is different because the moving party was alleging that the alienating parent/ defendant's alienating conduct has caused emotional distress.  Therefore emotional distress, not alienation of affection, is the underlying cause of action.  Lawyers in New Jersey and across the United States will be watching this case closely to determine if the alienated parent will ultimately prevail in the legal action.  If so, then those unfortunate parents being confronted by severely alienated children may have another avenue to seek out justice against alienating parents.  To read more about this new theory of recovery, please click here.

The media is abuzz regarding the recent divorce petition filed against Mel Gibson by his wife.  Mel married Robyn Moore in June of 1980.  During the 28 years of their marriage, they have had seven children, one of whom is still a minor.  The marital estate has been estimated at a low of $600 million to a high of $1.2 billion.  Divorce attorneys in West Palm Beach, Florida and elsewhere shook their heads in dismay when they learned that Mel Gibson did not have a prenuptial agreement or a post-nuptial agreement.  Someone may object to say that 28 years ago when this couple married, Mr. Gibson’s film career had just commenced and there was no reason for either of them to even think about a prenuptial agreement.  However, family lawyers would respond that his earlier modest life should not excuse Mr. Gibson’s failure to attempt to negotiate a post-nuptial contract as his net worth increased.  This is particularly true since the parties have been separated for three years prior to the commencement of this action.  It is clear that even if there is only $600 million in the marital estate that Robyn Gibson, the wife, will receive at least half of that amount.  The good news to Mel Gibson is that such an award of joint community property will obviate any potential claim by the former wife regarding permanent alimony.  It remains to be seen whether this couple will duke it out in a” Road Warrior” fashion or if Mel Gibson really knows “what women want”.

Divorce lawyers in West Palm Beach and other areas of Florida often are asked to explain the secrets for having a long term marriage.  Family law attorneys in Palm Beach County and in other areas of the country may feel at a loss for words regarding this somewhat mystical and appealingly magical occurrence.  After all, we often are so focused in the process of assisting our clients to dissolve their marriages that we do not take note as to what contributes to the longevity of a relationship.  For example, as divorce attorneys, we can only guess the psychological, social, and relationship reasons that may have assisted Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward to have a happy and fulfilling 50 year marriage.  Consequently, we may ask ourselves whether there exist a science to having  a long term marriage.  Recently, Sarah Hampson addressed this issue in an article in the Globe and Mail newspaper.  The article is located here.  I think that you will be surprised in its assertions. Please click here to read the full article.

Divorce attorneys in West Palm Beach and the rest of Palm Beach County are familiar with spouses who sometimes make exorbitant claims during their divorce cases.  However, even these family lawyers may raise their eyebrows concerning a divorce case now being litigated in Connecticut.  A 36 year old Swedish countess, married to a former United States CEO, is demanding $53,000 per week in permanent alimony.  In doing so, the countess is requesting the divorce court overturn a written agreement of the parties that the wife will receive 43 million dollars for her support because it is not enough money to fund her lifestyle.  Currently in the United States, the median income is slightly more than $50,000 per year.  Consequently, the wife is requesting more money per week than these families make in a year.  Commentators, not surprisingly, are predicting that the countess will not be successful in her quest.  To learn more about this divorcing couple and the amazing demands of the wife, please click here.

Divorce lawyers in Palm Beach County and elsewhere are accustomed to receiving strange demands from their clients for the return of personal or cherished items that they may have acquired before or during the marriage.  However, one New York couple is putting a whole new twist on this issue.  In his divorce action in New York, Richard Batista, who donated one of his kidneys to his wife in 2001 (during their marriage) is demanding the return of his kidney or 1.5 million dollars.  Most people, including family law attorneys, would agree that this demand takes the concept of extracting a "pound of flesh" to new heights.  However, before you start shaking your head in disbelief, you need to view this allegation in the context of this very ugly and contentious divorce.  Allegations have flown back and forth between the parties, which have included adultery, improperly pandering the children to the press, and on and on.  To read more about this case and to view video about it, then please click here.  Another interesting part of this link is that the viewers of the link can vote on what they think about the kidney demand by the husband.  Unfortunately, this couple have three children who are in the middle of this madness.  It will be interesting to see what additional claims and counterclaims that this couple will make against each other and how the court will deal with them.

In these tough economic times, many parents are falling behind in the payment of child support.  Family lawyers in West Palm Beach are familiar with the increasing number of child support enforcement actions that potential clients are requesting.  The nonpayment of child support is an issue besetting the entire country.  The traditional method is to attempt to have the nonpaying parent found in contempt and imprisoned until a purge payment is paid toward the unpaid child support arrearages. 

However, Washington DC has come up with an interesting alternative: "Fathering Court".  This program is reserved for parents (both fathers and mothers) who are attempting to pay child support, but are legitimately unemployed or underemployed. An article about the program explains that the program makes an effort to change the lifestyle of the nonpaying parent.  The program emphasizes employment, starting with the basics and also provides education in proper parenting techniques.  This innovative approach should be carefully investigated by Florida and other states.  Perhaps the investment of similar programs around the country would be a better investment of our economic recovery dollars.

Valentine's Day is traditionally a day for expressing our love and affection for those whom we hold dear.  Unfortunately, family law attorneys in Palm Beach County also know that it is a day where there may be a spike in divorce filings.  Perhaps the stress of trying to make Valentine's Day a special day of love may simply trigger those who are already struggling in a relationship to just call it off.  When you are in a deteriorating relationship, the arrival of Valentine's Day may make you face reality that you have no love.  In addition, most divorce attorneys would agree that serving a divorce petition upon a spouse on or around Valentine's Day is an aggressive move which would upset the other party.  Anyone who is trying to peacefully dissolve their marriage would not serve their spouse on Valentine's Day.  

Nevertheless, some divorce attorneys recognize that some couples are ready to call it quits regardless of whether Valentine’s Day is being celebrated.  To Charleston divorce attorney, Rusty Webb, Valentine's Day brings a chance to offer a free divorce.  For a second year in a row, Attorney Webb is offering a free divorce to the West Virginia citizen who presents the most compelling story as to why they deserve a free divorce.  To apply for the contest, the interested individuals must submit a questionnaire where they have the opportunity to describe why they believe they deserve a free divorce.  All questionnaires must be submitted by February 13.  Attorney Webb will choose the winner on February 14, 2009.   

Whether you are a true believer in using Valentine's Day as a day to declare your love, or you are a disenchanted spouse who just can't take it anymore, Valentine's Day is not a day for indifference.  To learn more about Attorney Webb and his offer of a free divorce on Valentine's Day, please click here.  To visit the website of this enterprising attorney, please click here.

 To learn more about this couple,  please click here.

Hillary and Julie Goodridge, who share custody of their 12-year-old daughter, filed divorce papers in late January in Massachusetts.  The Goodridges were lead plaintiffs in the case against the State of Massachusetts, which successfully argued for equal marriage regardless of sexual orientation.  Divorce attorneys in West  Palm Beach, Florida, and elsewhere would agree that this development clearly establishes that gay couples, like straight couples, will fall in love, get married and, unfortunately, sometimes will get divorced.  The issue remains if this divorce will be acrimonious or will be civil.  Hopefully, for the sake of their 12-year-old daughter, this couple can proceed civilly and in a cooperative fashion with one another.  To learn more about this couple and their divorce, To learn more about this couple,  please click here.

We live in a mobile society.  As a result, many divorced or separated parents are often located in different communities, counties, or states.  Finding a location to meet to exchange the children for visitation/contact with each parent under such circumstances can be challenging.  Family lawyers and their clients may not be familiar with convenient locations to perform contact exchanges at the half way point between the residences of the parents.  Often where there is a need, the internet will provide a solution.  One such solution may be the website: www.meetways.com.  This website may provide assistance for parents and other individuals to find locations of interest (such as restaurants and other similar establishments) between two addresses.  It may provide assistance to families who are traveling or to divorced families who are looking for a convenient place to perform a contact exchange.  To learn more about this website,  please click here.

Teen pregnancy concerns parents, their children, and society.  Family lawyers, in West Palm Beach, Florida and elsewhere, at times deal with families with such problems. The options are few and the pain, frustration, and sorrow are great.  Society has been seeking ways to prevent teenage pregnancy.  The State of Texas has added a new tool to the arsenal of prevention.  The State of Texas now requires its high school students to take a class on parenting and paternity awareness.  The class, according to a recent article, teaches teenagers to calculate child support payments as well as other costs associated with pregnancy and raising a child.  The course also teaches its students other factors involved in raising a child.  The purpose of the course is to provide to young people the reality involved in raising children so that they can make responsible decisions in the future.  Hopefully, one result of this class is to assist children in delaying child-bearing until they are better equipped to take care of children.  This addition to the curriculum of Texas schools appears to be an excellent one and should also be considered in Florida and elsewhere.  To learn more about the program  please click here.

Divorce attorneys in West Palm Beach and elsewhere acknowledge that custody/visitation battles and can be bitter and highly acrimonious.  Emotions run high and sometimes good judgment is abandoned by both parents.  When the loss of good judgment is combined with modern technology, then the results can become tragic and out of proportion.  However, one parent recently sunk to a new low. According to court documents in Omaha, a mother recently was caught after she placed a listening device inside the teddy bear of her four–year-old-daughter during a custody battle.  Little did the father know that the miniature bear (which he had given to his daughter as a present and which the little girl carried everywhere with her) was doing more than just staring at him with its beady little eyes.  Fortunately, the court did not permit the tapes to be entered into evidence.  Nebraska's law (like Florida's law on recording) does not permit the admission into evidence of tape recordings of conversations, unless all participants agree to be recorded.  In this case, no one agreed to be recorded, including the teddy bear.  Subsequently, the father brought a civil law suit against the mother and her attorneys for illegally recording him. 

Undertaking such clandestine recordings have backfired this mother.  The father obtained a more generous contact schedule with his daughter (against which the mother had been contesting) and she now faces civil liabilities and potentially criminal prosecution.  In addition, the family judges will view any additional claims that she makes in the future with skepticism.  Family law attorneys in Palm Beach County and elsewhere in the United States always advise their clients to proceed legally in their client divorce cases.  Generally they will caution their clients against recording conversations unless it is clear that everyone in the conversation has consented to the recording.  To learn more about this overly zealous parent, please click here.

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Part of the ritual of commencing a new year often entails looking back at significant events of the past year.  That phenomenon is the same for divorce attorneys, whether they are located in Palm Beach County or elsewhere in the country.  Not surprising, family lawyers often look back at the remarkable divorce cases of the past year.  Americans are often celebrity crazy and can't seem to get enough of celebrity gossip or dirt.  When combined, these two dynamics produce a review of interesting celebrity divorces ranging from Guy Ritchie vs. Madonna to David Duchovney vs. Tea Leoni.  Some of these couples are like watching train wrecks.  Others are too ridiculous to be real.  To review the tongue-in-cheek review of many of the celebrity divorces for 2008, please click here.

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Australia is a country/continent of kangaroos, wombats and long stretches of vast, sparsely-inhabited areas.  It is a country where many children in its outback are educated through instruction over the television and doctors fly to isolated residences and stations (ranches) to make house calls.  As a result, the Australian court system has undertaken some innovative ways by which to communicate with individuals during legal proceedings and to serve process on individuals.  Consequently, it does not surprise me that the Australian courts have approved - in some circumstances - service by email and in a recent instance, service of a foreclosure notice by Facebook.  Facebook provides social interaction and connections for individuals on the internet, not as a conduit for legal proceedings. 

However, such service should be considered, even in Australia, to be the exception to the rule rather than the rule of thumb.  Service by email or by Facebook would be only one step in demonstrating to the court that an attorney has done everything in his or her power to obtain service of some court document upon an individual or family.  Consequently, even in Australia, it is not likely to replace the more traditional methods of service of process upon an individual.  

The Australian experience, in many ways, is quite different from the American experience.  Consequently, service of process is generally accomplished far easier in the majority of the American states than it would be in many areas of Australia.  Nevertheless, there are circumstances whereby an individual or family may attempt to avoid service of process.  Consequently, it is not unthinkable that under a particular set of circumstances, an American court may approve service by email.  However, I think it is an additional significant step for an American court authorizing service by Facebook.  Consequently, American litigants should rest easy regarding their participation and entries on Facebook or other social internet interaction websites regarding this issue for the moment. To read the article, please click here .

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Family lawyers in Palm Beach County and elsewhere know and recognize that no client likes paying alimony.  They also recognize that clients hate the thought of paying alimony if their former spouses are living or cohabitating with a new partner. Consequently, wars can be waged between divorce attorneys concerning the issue of when and how cohabitation may terminate the payment of alimony.  Recently, divorce attorneys in Florida were somewhat surprised by a court decision that cohabitation with a cellmate in prison may constitute cohabitation to a sufficient degree to terminate alimony.  Andrew Craissati of Palm Beach Gardens, Florida challenged paying alimony to his former wife, Patricia, arguing that their agreement called for him to pay alimony only until her remarriage or if she "cohabitated" with another person for more than three months. Sometime after their divorce, Patricia Craissati was sentenced to prison.  The local appellate court has ruled that she had been "cohabitating' with her cellmate for more than three months. This cohabitation was sufficient to meet the terms of the agreement of the former spouses and the court ordered that her alimony be terminated.  The moral of the story is to be careful how you draft your marital settlement agreement. You may unexpectedly obtain what you bargained for.  To further explore the background of this fascinating case, please click here .

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Divorcing families in Palm Beach County and elsewhere know that the current economic times are impacting on their budgets.  Even with two incomes, many families are just barely making their monthly payments.  When divorce papers are filed on the other spouse, then it may become extremely tense and unfriendly in the marital residence.  Coming home is like returning to a battle zone.  The atmosphere is tense and it seems like there exists no place of respite or area where one can collect his or her thoughts and find some peace. In such circumstances, family lawyers have urged their clients to decide which spouse will leave the home while a divorce is pending.  If the spouses could not decide who would move, then the courts may make that decision for the unhappy couple.  With more and more people losing their jobs and the foreclosure rate soaring higher and higher, it is clear that many couples cannot afford to support two households during a divorce.  What is a divorcing family to do? 

The options are not many.  But some options do exist.  Family law attorneys may recommend that the spouses negotiate a "good' behavior contract that outlines behavioral guidelines and communication do's and don'ts while they remain in the home.  These contracts can sometimes be negotiated by a mental health professional.  Such arrangements are difficult, but sometimes can work well if the divorcing couple is centered on doing what is best for their children and if there exists a sufficient number of bedrooms in the marital home for them to each have their own.  Another option is for one of the spouses to move in with a family member or a friend.  In addition, many real estate companies are becoming more aggressive in obtaining renters for vacant homes at minimum prices.  Many of these leases can be short term and can be a temporary solution to a financially troubled divorcing family.   

It seems that the internet also provides some type of solution to every problem imaginable.  The lack of affordable housing for divorcing families in need of short term leases is no different.  "Stand By Housing" is a web based company that attempts to match short term leases with individuals in cities around the United States and Canada. It seeks to match individuals who are looking to lease their residences for a short period of time with those who are looking for a short term residence.

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Family lawyers often are asked questions about prenuptial agreements and postnuptial agreements.  A prenuptial agreement occurs between individuals who are planning to marry.  It deals with the obligations and rights of the parties in the event that they either die or divorce.  A postnuptial agreement deals with the same issues, but occurs after the parties have been married.  The questions that divorce attorneys in Palm Beach County and elsewhere receive generally about these agreements are whether such agreements are enforceable under Florida divorce law (they are if certain requirements are met) and whether and why to have a prenuptial agreement or postnuptial agreement.  I recently came across a blog that was titled:  “Eight Reasons Why You Should Have a Prenup”.  This is one of the better blogs on this topic.  The eight important reasons in the blog are: 

1.         You are much wealthier than your partner.  A prenuptial agreement can ensure that your partner is marrying you for who you are, and not for your money. 

2.         You earn much more than your partner.  A prenuptial agreement can be used in many states to limit the amount of alimony that is payable. 

3.         You are remarrying.  When you remarry, your legal and financial concerns are often very different than in your first marriage.  You have children from a previous marriage, support obligations, and own a home, or other significant assets.  A prenuptial agreement can ensure that when you pass away, your assets are distributed according to your wishes, and that neither your first family, nor your new family are cut off. 

4.         Your partner had a high debt load.  If are marrying someone with a significant debt load, and don't want to be responsible for those debts if your marriage ends, then a prenuptial agreement can help ensure that this does not happen. 

5.         You own part of a business.  With a prenuptial agreement, when your marriage ends, your spouse could end up owning a share of your business.  Your business partners may not want this to happen or you may not want this to happen.  A prenuptial agreement can ensure that your spouse does not become an unwanted partner in your business. 

6.         To prevent your spouse from overturning your estate plan.  A prenuptial agreement can ensure that your estate plan works, and, for instance, ensure that a specific heirloom remains in your family. 

7.         You are much poorer than your partner.  Just as a prenuptial agreement can be used to protect your spouse, who is well off, a prenuptial agreement also can be used to ensure that a partner, who is weaker financially, is protected. 

8.         If you plan to quit your job to raise children.  Quitting your job will negatively impact your income and your wealth.  A prenuptial agreement can ensure that the financial burden of raising children is shared fairly by both parents. 

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We are a society of working parents.  In the majority of households, both parents are working either full time or part time.  During this economic recession, couples are doing everything they can to remain employed, including working longer hours and taking few holidays.  Not surprisingly, a question frequently asked of family lawyers by their clients is: “How old should a child be before he or she can be left home alone?"  At this time of year (when holidays are coming fast upon us and when parents will be at work), the question is asked even more frequently.  This is not a phenomenon limited to the end-of-year holiday season.  Divorce attorneys often are asked similar questions during school spring breaks and school summer vacations.   

Like most issues concerning children, there is no simple one size answer that fits all situations.  The decision is complicated because much depends upon the individual child and also the family dynamics.  There also are other factors to be considered.  They can include:  quality of the neighborhood in which the family lives; the contentiousness of the divorce or the attack upon the parenting skills of either parent and the availability and affordability of childcare programs for your children during holiday period.  In addition, a parent needs to consider not only whether his or her particular child is “old enough”, but also whether the child is ready to be left home alone.  The question becomes far more complicated when there are younger siblings also at home.  In essence, is the oldest child ready to stay at home and to be in charge of his or her younger siblings?   

Some states have a bright line definition which specify in age (e.g. 12 years old) when it is legal to leave children alone.  The majority of states, including Florida, do not establish a specific age.  Instead, they consider the maturity level and sophistication of the child.  In Florida, there is no state law specifying how old the child must be before the child can be left alone at home.  In addition, the State of Florida Department of Children and Families does not have a bright line definition for this issue.  It is determined on a case-by-case basis.  With this lack of specific guidance, each family must make its own careful consideration.  Attorney Jeanne Hannah of Michigan has developed a set of guideline questions that parents should be asking themselves when deciding this issue.  However, parents must remember that these guidelines are not the deciding factor.  The deciding factor is the maturity, sophistication and ability of your individual child to handle the potential worse case scenarios. 

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A Miami -Dade Circuit Court Judge ruled recently that Florida's 30 -year old ban on gay adoptions is unconstitutional.  In doing so, the Florida juvenile division jurist permitted a North Miami man to adopt two foster chidren, whom he and his male partner have been raising since 2004.  Judge Cindy Lederman's 53 page decision, which permitted 47 year old Frank Gill to adopt the 4 and 8 year old half brothers, is sure to set the stage for a constitutional show down. The decision by Judge Lederman was based on a legal analysis that incorporated existing statutes and case law and was strongly based on the issues of permanency, the best interests of these children, and upon the fact that these children have been thriving under the care of Mr. Gill and his partner.  The decision by Judge Lederman should not surprise family law attorneys in West Palm Beach and elsewhere in Florida.  This is the second decision by a Florida trial judge this year to declare the state's blanket ban on adoption by gay men and lesbians to be unconstitutional.  In August, 2008 Munroe County Circuit Judge Audlin also issued an opinion, stating that the ban was unconstitutional.  Florida Attorney General's office has stated that it will appeal the decisions.  Florida family lawyers will be watching this appellate battle closely.  The outcome may have legal and psychological ramifications far beyond juvenile court.  To learn more about the recent decision in Miami-Dade, please click here. 

The end of the year holiday season is rapidly approaching its conclusion.  Despite the tight economic times, as the days pass, we will see more people driving, shopping, and acquiring presents to give to their loved ones.  This is true whether you are divorced, single, or still married.  As we become more psychologically harried and stressed, we may tend to become less security minded.  Common sense is a big factor when you are shopping or out and about during the holiday season.  Here are some interesting tidbits to keep in mind as each day gets closer to the holidays:

 Keep your car doors locked, and store gifts and purchases out of view.

 Keep garage doors closed.

Lock car doors when fueling or "running into the mini mart".

Shop with friends, whenever possible.  There is safety in numbers.

Avoid becoming an easy mark in the parking lot by being aware of noises and movements and having your keys in your hands, ready to open your vehicle.  Be sure to look into the vehicle's front and rear seat before entering it, and lock your vehicle as soon as you get in,

Carry you handbag close to your body with the clasp or flap secured and facing toward you.  Never leave your purse on a store counter, on the floor in a restroom or in a dressing room.

 Don't shop till you drop.  Avoid holiday shopping burnout and don't burden yourself with too many packages.

To read additional security minded comments, then please visit Paul Kirstein's blog here.

Most divorce attorneys in Palm Beach County, Florida and elsewhere agree that too much internet use may cause a strain on a marriage.  All family lawyers agree that one spouse having an affair will cause great harm to a marriage.  Put these behaviors together and you have a recipe for disaster, both psychologically and legally.  David Pollard and Amy Taylor divorced after Amy caught her husband having a "virtual affair" on the internet while participating in the internet game, Second Life. 

This British couple met in an online chat room in 2003 and married after discovering a shared love of the internet game, "Second Life". Second Life is a virtual reality web based game, in which the players create characters, known as avatars, which then interact with other participants.  So great was this couple's interest in Second Life that after they were married, they also conducted a wedding ceremony in this virtual world.

After their marriage, Amy and David continued to spend a great deal of time gaming on the internet, which also included Second Life.  Unfortunately, it appears that David became too involved in his internet worlds.  To his wife's outrage, David's interaction with the characters of Second Life, included virtual infidelity with a female character, who played the role of a prostitute.  After catching her husband in the act, Amy promptly divorced him.  The moral of the story is that couples need to keep anchored in reality and avoid excessive use of the internet.  Couples, who do spend a lot of the time on the internet involved in virtual worlds, need to remember that "cheating is cheating".  It does not matter if it happens in your real life or your virtual life.  To learn more about this couple and their divorce, please click here.

Most people, including family law attorneys, have a fascination with celebrity divorces.  The more famous the participants are, the more interested we become in them.  Madonna has attempted to keep herself in the limelight and center stage of the public's attention throughout her career.  For the most part, she has been successful.  Her divorce is no exception.  Currently, Madonna and Guy Ritchie are involved in a divorce in England.  The couple have two children, Rocco and David (both under the age of 9), who are British citizens. Rumors have it that Madonna wants to relocate the children permanently to the United States.  In order to do so, she would need permission of the British divorce court or her husband.

 With such relocation issues, divorce lawyers may advise their clients to do what is necessary to appear that they are cooperative parents, that they are nourishing nurturing and advancing a close relationship between their children and their spouse, and that they not appear as control fanatics.  Madonna has been rumored to be a control freak. A recent visit of the party's children to England seems to reaffirm this rumor. After being separated from their father for several weeks, Madonna flew the children to London to visit with their father.  No explanation is given as to why it took so long for her to agree to permit the children to visit with their father.

In addition, Madonna sent a list of several rules for her husband, Guy Ritchie, to follow during the visit.  Some of the rules make sense and are within the realm of reasonable requests to make during a divorce.  They include:  Don't discuss the divorce with the children.  Don't introduce the children to your new female friends.

However, some of the rules are, on their face, unreasonable.  Those demands include: All water consumed by the children must be a special Kabala water.  The father is to be present with the children at all times (the children are not permitted to spend large blocks of time with their paternal grandparents).  The children are not permitted to watch television or watch DVDs.  The children are only to wear the clothing that Madonna sent with them.  The children are not to be photographed.  She is to have phone contact three to four times per day.  Such rules are overly rigid and may an attempt to exert control over the other parent.  With these rules, Madonna is not presenting the proper image for a parent who desires to relocate the residency of her children to another country.  It will be interesting to continue to observe Madonna in terms of parenting issues to determine if she continues this image and her restrictive rules.  To learn more about Madonna's rules for visitation as reported by London newspapers, please click here.

The upcoming holiday season is always stressful.  However this year, with the economic conditions of our country effecting families across the board, for many people the stress will be increased.  Most parents are psychologically stressed by their more limited gift giving budgets for their children this year.  This emotional headache and heartache is especially true for families undergoing a divorce or separation.  They may not have the financial resources to meet their general expenses, much less the extra cost of gifts.  The attached article provides excellent strategies for such parents by getting their children involved in the discussion and budgeting for holiday presents.  The suggestions are age appropriate for children and teens and are timely for both intact and transitioning families.

Most family lawyers know that many people (although not nearly enough) who are married, prepare and execute wills, living wills, healthcare powers of attorney, and other estate planning documents.  Generally, spouses will name each other as the beneficiary of their respective wills, healthcare representatives, and so on.  Spouses also frequently designate each other as beneficiaries in their life insurance policies.  Amazing, most people when their marriage is heading towards a breakup do not change these documents and delete their spouses as beneficiaries or trustees.  If your relationship with your spouse is particularly ugly, you probably don’t want your spouse making medical care decisions for you.  Even if your marriage is ending in a friendly fashion, it seems unfair to put your spouse in the position of making that type of decision and, potentially, being second-guessed by your other family members. 

Many divorce attorneys can recount the horrors of clients who have not changed, or have not attempted to change, the beneficiaries of their insurance policies from the names of their former spouses.  Consequently, Rule No. 1 if you’re getting divorced or have recently been divorced is to change your estate planning documents immediately.  A close second would be that you also should arrange for the changing of your named beneficiaries in your insurance policies, unless the court order provides otherwise. 

This is a classic case of an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.

On November 4, 2008, voters will be voting in the current presidential election.  Florida voters will be voting on a series of proposed constitutional amendments.  Proposed Constitutional Amendment 2 is entitled, euphemistically, the Florida Marriage Protection Amendment.  This proposed constitutional amendment defines marriage as the legal union of only "one man and one woman as husband and wife."  If passed, it would ban gay marriage and civil unions and would endanger publicly recognized domestic partnerships if they are deemed to be "substantially equivalent" to marriage.   

References to "marriage protection, or gay marriage ban" are misleading as four existing Florida statutes already define marriage as the union of a man and a woman and/or otherwise prohibit the recognition of "same-sex marriages".  The legality or recognition of "same-sex unions" in Florida will be no more or less illegal in Florida regardless of the outcome of the proposed amendment. 

This vague and broad language could also risk termination of several established domestic relation partnership registries which are currently accessible to millions of Floridians.  These registries allow unmarried Floridians to share benefits or other protections such as hospital visitation, burial rights and health care benefits.  Currently, Miami Beach, Gainesville, West Palm Beach, Key West, as well as Miami/Dade County, and Broward and Palm Beach Counties all have domestic partner registries.  In addition, most Florida universities and more than half of the Fortune 500 companies offer domestic partnership benefits.  These benefits would be placed at risk, if not outright abolished, if this amendment passes.  The non-partisan and independent Office of Economic and Demographics Research again cites this concern in finding:  "that domestic partnership registries are deemed substantially equivalent to marriage, their termination could place registrants at risk of losing specified rights and benefits such as those related to health insurance".  The wording of Amendment 2 is similar to the constitutional amendment that Michigan passed in 2004, which the Michigan Supreme Court later ruled prohibits employers like universities and cities from extending benefits to domestic partners. 

As Floridians, we should be concerned by the range of impact Amendment 2 could have on us and our neighbors.  It is simply not worth the risk that Amendment 2 could take away existing legal protections and benefits from even a single Floridian.  Accordingly, I request that the readers of this blog oppose the adoption of Amendment 2 and ask their friends and neighbors to join us in speaking out and voting against this inappropriate provision. 

Most people don't want to think about death or be reminded about death.  Therefore, they are reluctant to consider making wills or purchasing life insurance policies.  Most parents don't want to think about their children dying or be reminded of that drastic possibility.  Consequently, most parents don't consider life insurance for their children.  In addition, this is an area overlooked by many divorce attorneys. 

Recently I was discussing the issue of life insurance for children with Patricia Kearney, Financial Services Representative for BankUnited in the West Palm Beach area.  During our conversation, we discussed several advantages for having life insurance policies on our children.  Those reasons included:

1.                 The medical expenses and burial costs as a result of the unfortunate demise of children;

2.                 The loss of child support as a result of the death of a child.  It is an unfortunate truth that many of primary residential/custodial parents depend upon maintaining the lifestyle of their children and of their household, in part, by the child support that they receive.  Family law attorneys often try to provide for the loss of child support by requiring the former spouse paying child support to obtain life insurance.  However, we often do not consider the need of life insurance to be carried for the minor children themselves;

3.                 The loss of the income stream.  The death of a child after a divorce may cause financial distress.  However, there is no doubt that it causes emotional devastation.  A parent can be in a severe case of depression for weeks if not months.  Many parents often never recover emotionally from the loss of a child.  Such depression and emotional stress can cause one to stop working, lose employment, or greatly diminish their income stream.  With a reduced income stream come other financial stresses.  Mortgages, car payments, and other monthly expenses still must be paid whether a devastated parent is receiving income or not.  Even if a parent only had a modest life insurance policy on their child, that parent might be able to stave off financial destruction.

As a result, our office urges that all our clients purchase life insurance policies for their children.  Unfortunately, one cannot purchase term insurance for their children.  However the whole life insurance purchase for children also will guarantee their continued insurability as they become older. 

For more information about insurance for children, you can contact Patricia Kearney at pkearney@bankunited.com or you can consult with any of your own insurance consultants.